Hi all, it’s James here. I know I haven’t posted for a long time but I’ve been super busy with school and work. Speaking of school, I’ve been sitting here with my discrete math (blah) and listening to the Elmo movie that Joel is watching in the living room. Just a few minutes ago, Shell asked me to grab some stuff to wash because she was going to start a load of linens. I grabbed the stuff and she proceeded to start the wash. I got back to my work and suddenly this 5-year-old came running through the kitchen towards the laundry room with a towel. I said, “Hey Joel!” because I know that he likes to try to make the washer his personal pool. A few second later I heard the washer open and close and our daughter said, “He put it in the washer”!
Yeah, he’s not letting on just how much he understands us. Just thought I would share that.
Posted by unlockingdoors on August 30, 2012
Posted by unlockingdoors on July 18, 2012
Early this morning I was chatting with a good friend of mine and she asked me about how we deal with public acceptance whenever Joel is stimming or being vocal. Maybe a little backstory is in order. Shell and I went on Joel’s field trip at the end of the last school year, to the Oklahoma Aquarium. We had a good time. Joel was more interested in the open water exhibits and frequently tried to climb into the exhibits. I can just imagine our son sitting in a tank of water with Blue Shell crabs all around him. I don’t exactly know who I would feel more sorry for, him or the crabs. It wouldn’t be pretty either way. But after we finished up at the aquarium we signed Joel out from his class and decided that we had seen enough fish, now it was time to dine on some. So off to one of our farvorite new eating establishments, Fish Daddy’s. Joel was in an especially vocal mood that day and you can’t scold a kid for that. It’s like having a conversation for him. So there we are, and this woman keeps staring Joel down. Not looking at him with curiosity or interest. Not approaching us to ask an intelligent question. She is literally staring my little buddy down. Well, I take offense to it and as soon as I let Shell know she starts talking me down off of the ledge. And we finish our meal and leave the restaraunt without incident. I hate to be crass but it just burns my ass that people have so little tact that they will noticeably stare. I don’t know maybe it has something to do with my dad. For those of you who don’t know he was a paraplegic. I know being paraplegic isn’t a big deal but when you grow up in a small Oklahom town and there’s plenty of uppity people there, it becomes a big deal. There’s were quite a few times when I would see people being rude to my father and I know it got to him. Now I see people who are starting to be rude to my son and it bothers the hell out of me. Shell now puts a shirt on him that says “Autism is My Superpower”. But why should he have to advertise it? It’s nobody’s business but ours. And at that length, why should anyone in our party be made to feel uncomfortable because of another persons ignorance? Maybe I’m overreacting. I guess I should look at it from the stance that they will never experience what we will. Where he has to use kisses instead of words. Where holding him in my chair and rocking is better than any words I could ever say to him. I’ve heard people say that kids with autism don’t lie. They dont judge. Well I think they’re pure. I can’t think of a trait that Joel has that is tainted by some outside influence. And these people won’t experience this. They’re stuck inside the snowglobe they call life.
Do me a favor, if you’re a parent with a neuro-typical child and even if you don’t have any kids, but you’ve read this. If you ever happen upon an atypical person and their caregiver in a public place that’s displaying traits like these please don’t stare. Smile, nod as if you understand. If you are so bold and the person is having a physical issue, offer your assistance. Your understanding might help restore a little faith in humanity.
As for me I will soak up all of this little guy that I can.
Friday morning I had to mow the lawn. Our lawn mower had just been on the fritz and I didn’t get around to fixing it until Thursday evening and Friday morning I didn’t get around until 0830.Big Mistake, it was H-O-T! But I got it done. After I came in I grabbed a drink and walked through the living room to find Joel on top of the TV cart trying to swipe the movie titles on Netflix like he does the apps on his iPad. Too frickin’ cute.
Posted by unlockingdoors on July 14, 2012
Remember when I said “mission accomplished” earlier. Yeah, well, famous freaking last words. Is it just me or is Facebook tricky? It’s probably just me. It’s not like I’m completely new to it, but for some reason, I’m struggling. Here is a drawing I did just now documenting me at a low point this evening.
I would have had Maya draw this, but she’s in bed asleep. On top of my failure on the interwebs, Joel was especially moody today. There were meltdowns and crying jags and just general unhappiness. I’m hoping tomorrow will turn out a little bit brighter. I’m hopeful, if not completely optimistic.
Posted by unlockingdoors on July 13, 2012
I have been relatively lazy these past few days blog-wise, but it’s summer and laziness is allowed. I figured I would pop by and update on “Keurig-gate” which is yet unresolved. We did a complete search of Joel’s bedroom and it was not found. We have resorted to using Husband’s french press for coffee in the mornings which will do for now. More on this harrowing story as it develops.
In other news, Joel has developed a serious interest in our garage. Fortunately, the door leading to it has a double lock and he has only figured out one of them. We are combatting his new interest with the only tools we have for matters of this nature which are diligence and full-on-compulsive-checking of the door and locks.
Tomorrow is July 4th and we will be celebrating our nation’s independence with a visit from my mom and sister. It will most likely be a clash of the drama titans when my family’s crazy connects with their craziness. We don’t get to see them as often as we would like to so when we do get together we always over plan to make the visits perfect. We’ve found that this method usually blows up in our faces, so my sister and I have agreed to have realistic expectations so as not to stress ourselves out. We’ll see how that goes. If all else fails, we will have alcohol on hand.
Posted by unlockingdoors on July 3, 2012
Here’s the problem. I want coffee with my toast, but we can’t find the little cup that holds our reusable filter for our Keurig coffee maker. I don’t want to blame Joel, but it was probably Joel who took it. He has this compulsive behavior that causes him to grab things at random (or what seems random to us neurotypicals in the house) and runs away with it as quickly as his little legs will carry him before anyone can take whatever it was away. After that, who knows. It could be anywhere at this point. I washed it a couple of nights ago and left it in the dish drainer next to the sink. In the morning, when I went to make some coffee, it was gone. The filter and the lid was there, however. So, no coffee for me until that little sucker is found.
Until then, looks like I’ll be having tea for breakfast.
Posted by unlockingdoors on June 30, 2012